It’s finally home sweet home for Shiny, and a lot of comfort for many who have been so concerned for the past few days. Funny as it sounds, now that we look back, the last 5 days just felt so surreal. So much of roller coaster ride. o much of uncertainty. So must of testing over perseverance and faith. We still believe everything happens for a reason.
With Shiny being “out of service” for a while, I cannot deny the fear and anxiety that I am going through. It doesn’t help when I start to realize the many types of people that I have to work with; the genuine, the devious, the manipulative, the opportunist, the generous, the kind, the couldn’t-give-a-damn, etc…. the list goes on. My eyes are suddenly opened even wider since the absence of my backbone.
I just have this strange feeling that the days to come will be very challenging and I will be tested of my Christ likeness. How do I deal with integrity and ethics? How do I say no to people who try to manipulate me for their own advantage? How do I even know who to trust? Gosh, is this what corporate ladder is all about?
I know that I made a point from the moment we knew Shiny was certified as “unfit” for work, that I will do all that I can to ensure that nothing changes. I will continue to do my part and make sure the organization functions at its best. Nothing will change with or without him cos that’s just how it should be. He’s not going to be here forever to shield and shelter us! B-U-T….it’s just been 4 days this week and all hell is breaking loose…. I can feel myself starting to lose control over situations and have people climb all over me; taking full advantage that now they can start to pounce on me because no one is around to bail me out. Doesn’t help when the other one only cares about one thing – seize the opportunity.
I’m stuck. I’m stressed. I’m worried. I’m very unhappy.
Argh. Kay, I’ll figure this out. I will. God have mercy.